Want to learn NeoTantra but not sure where to start?
Excited about experiencing a Tantric massage and in search of the real deal?
Do you want to feel safe and know you can trust the person offering you a private session?
Tantra is a vast subject and at its core is a deeply spiritual practice that can includes celebrating sex as an art form and act of worship. In the West most people practice NeoTantra which includes the celebration of conscious sexuality, using pleasure as a tool for transformation and empowerment. Tantrikas hold that everything including the body and sexual energy can be a vehicle for awakening.
Tantra is the new buzz word and there are lots of people out there, some of them even well meaning, who say they are offering Tantra. How do you find the real deal?
When you are exploring, especially in private sessions, it is important to ensure that you're in good hands. Teaching Tantra requires training and an ongoing commitment to personal practice. Doing one workshop is a good start but unless you really implement what you learned it may be limited to a peak experience. Supporting people in exploring their sexuality is deep shadow work. Holding them through the range of ecstatic and tender places that arise requires huge integrity as well as substantial training and skill. Especially in private sessions the experience should be in service of the student's needs not providers.
Ways to be sure the person is genuine and professionally trained:
1. Check out their credentials and where they studied. They should have a certificate(s) from their Tantra school(s). The best teachers have studied with a wide range of teachers
2. Listing as an approved practitioner on their Tantra School's website
3. Check out their website. If they are professionals they will have one even if it is only one page like any other business
4. Read testimonials from their other students. If they don't have those in writing, request some phone numbers for previous students that you can call for a referral
5. Ask for a reference from other NeoTantra professionals you know about their experience and reputation
6. Talk to them on the phone to get a better sense of what they are offering to be sure it meets your needs and expectations
7. Trust your gut. If something feels off it probably is
Private sessions given by trustworthy individuals should be in service of you not the practitioner's own needs. There is a huge difference in experience and what is possible in a session with a professional compared to someone who is simply doing this for fun. Professionals have lots of experience dealing with a range of people and have hours of real time experience navigating the complex waters of supporting people in exploring their sexuality.
If you are being offered a free session, ask why.
Most authentic NeoTantra professionals do this work full time. I know a handful of good practitioners that are retired from their jobs or who are doing NeoTantra as a second job and do not need to charge for their services. This is the exception rather than the rule. No therapist, doctor or lawyer would regularly offer their services for free. More likely if someone is offering you a free session they are new and wanting to practice or may simply be using this as an excuse to satisfy their own needs.
8. Boundary Pushing
Authentic NeoTantra practitioners can do everything they need to do with you fully clothed with energy. Share your boundaries at the beginning of the session and maintain those throughout
9. Pressure to have sex during the session
Intercourse never needs to be part of a NeoTantra session. While hands on work is very powerful, big shifts can happen with breath, energy and sounding. NeoTantra is not about sex.
10. No testimonials from previous students
While this work often requires confidentiality and discretion they should still be able to provide some testimonials from previous students either written or on the phone.
Most professional NeoTantra teachers have a range of ways they can support you. Many hands-on providers who are genuinely teaching NeoTantra also offer classes, workshops and retreats to give you lots of different ways to learn. Some have free material like blogs, YouTube videos and Facebook pages to support you along your path.
This blog was inspired by all the genuine people who are searching for an authentic NeoTantric experience. Here's to you finding the perfect teacher to support you on your path to wholeness, empowerment and ecstasy.
Caroline Carrington is an internationally-acclaimed NeoTantra Educator and Conscious Relationship & Intimacy Coach inspiring people to live empowered lives across the US and around the world. She expands people’s experience of pleasure, intimacy and connection through relationships, energy play and dynamic meditation. Caroline loves building bridges between communities in the realms of NeoTantra, BDSM, Polyamory, and Bhakti Yoga. Caroline welcomes people of all genders, races and relationship styles and is LGBTQ+ friendly. She is passionate about walking NeoTantra out of the bedroom and into the world and bringing the sacred back into sexuality. Caroline is available for private sessions, experiential workshops and personalized intensives. She co-founded www.SarasaTantra.com with Julia Tindall to offer retreats and NeoTantra Teacher Trainings with high integrity in a safely held container.
Learn more what she offers at www.JewelintheLotusCoaching.com
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